Tag Archives: Food

The Real Reason Starbucks Is Failing

Seriously, I was just from a Jamba Juice in midtown Manhattan, and I’m telling you — this is the new overpriced “hip drink.”

And yes, I bought one, in a size that equaled three of my bladders.

Tweaked-out caffeine culture is out — tweaked-out juice culture is in.

Child Abuse? Mother Forces Son To Eat Skittles

I know, I know — it’s harmless, right?

But, it’s also sort of gross and denotes a lack of of good sense on the part of the mom.

The story comes from the blog The Delicious Truth and is as follows:

The other night I was walking on a quiet, tree-lined street in a residential neighborhood of Manhattan known for its intellectual and progressive thinking. A 12-year-old boy (wearing a helmet) whizzed past me on his scooter. His mother, about 20 yards behind, was clutching a light blue, 2.17 ounce bag of “Tropical” Skittles. Hey, Tommy,” she bellowed, “come here and eat these . . . I want to get rid of them.”

Okay, several things:

1. Skittles are not food.

2. 12-year-olds are hyper enough, aren’t they? Than to push little discs of pure sugar on them?

3. She makes him wear a helmet, but offers him a big bag of Skittles to finish, flooding his body with sugar, pushing him that much closer to the sort of induced diabetes more and more kids are prey to these days.

4. Why is the woman in such a rush to get rid of these? What, they might go stale? Are they like grapes? Skittles will last until the day of the flood. You could stock bomb shelters with these suckers and they’d be fine.

The Delicious Truth continues, listing the ingredients of the Skittles:

According to the back of the bag, “Tropical” Skittles are “sugar, corn syrup, hydrogenated palm kernel oil, apple juice from concentrate, less than 2% – citric acid, dextrin, gelatin, artificial and natural flavors, coloring (includes yellow 5 lake, yellow 6 lake, blue 1 lake, red 50 lake, red 40, yellow 5, yellow 6, blue1), food starch – modified, ascorbic acid (vitamin C).” I’m sure you can’t find most of this stuff at your local farmers market.

Now here is the question: is this, as the cited blog claims, a very subtle form of child abuse? Is pushing or providing unhealthy food for consumption a form of neglect or child endangerment?

“C’mon Junior — eat mommy’s Skittles! Or else I’m gonna have to put them in the mystery meatloaf tomorrow!”

I repeat: Skittles are not food.

They CAN be vodka, however…

Fair Share Cake Plate

Potential cake-gluttons will be kept at bay when you use this handy-dandy “Fair Share” cake plate. The plate has a ruler around its circumference so you can measure your slices out. Obviously, the Fair Share plate is convenient for those cakes you must cut for many people. But, I also see a benefit for those who have family members or roommates who like to make refrigerator-ninja moves at 3:00 in the morning and eat all your damn cake.

(via Product Dose)

New Meat-Flavored Energy Drink

Meat Water energy drinks provide all the protein you need: and come in such flavors as Cheese Burger, Peking Duck, and Fish N’ Chips.

(via Inventor Spot)